seems like we don't even care.

yesterday i attended a meeting, the content of which was both inspiring and devastating. organized by living hope's social worker, the meeting was an attempt to bring together all the organizations working in the area so that networking can begin amongst us all.
it was interesting. i'm not sure how you measure success after a meeting like that. but it was very informative.

some of the things i learned devastated me. i'm just going to list them for you:
--in masiphumelele, a black township near to living hope's hopsice center, there is a group of 11-12 year old girls having sex with a group of 5-6 year old boys. from what i could gather, it was voluntarily happening on both sides. most of them have HIV.
--the department of social services which serves an area as big as brentwood, cool springs, and franklin combined doesn't even have an office in the area. the closest branch is some 20 miles away. include areas like capricorn, ocean view, masi, and red hill---four settlements in dire need of their own social services offices--and these people still would have to travel to file a basic claim or report for their safety.
--the representative from this deparment said that an emergency is defined as "a child's life being threatened or at risk". i laughed. first of all, how can you draw a line like this when you walk into a devastated community like capricorn, a place where every child is underclothed, undernourished, underloved, and likely the product of 2 drug-addicted or alcoholic parents, born to them under the age of 20? a place where kids get hit with candlesticks by their mom's, then sent out late at night to commit crimes which will bring in money for sugar and crystal meth--two necessities in capricorn homes. where mom's are too drunk most of the time to even notice that their 9 year old child hasn't come home in 6 months. a place where stepdads chase their stepchildren away in a drunken stupor, then try to have sex with those same kids if they come home and he's in a good mood.
how do you draw a line between "emergency" and "nonemergency" in a place such as this?
--the department of child welfare for these communities, known as CAFDA, is withdrawing (aka: shutting down) because they have had to compete for funds with the department of social services for so long that neither department can do anything effectively. that means that every family i know in capricorn with a social worker (all of whom are from CAFDA, assigned to the community members) gets lost in the battle for money. and this is supposed to help save kids lives?
--in the southern peninsula area (the area south of cape town, across to the 1 million member township of khayelitsha over to the large colored area of mitchell's plain, down through to muizenberg/capricorn, over the mountain to fish hoek, ocean view, and to the tip of south africa, there is (((((HEAR THIS))))) ONE social worker for every 13,000 cases.
--when asked if there is a way to speed up the process of referring an "emergency" to the department of social services, then actually seeing something, ANYTHING, happen (such as a home visit, phone call, police intervention, etc), the representative said, in essence, "nope".
"can we provide a social worker to do the home visit and then give you the report, perhaps speeding up the process?" (no.)


meanwhile, back in capricorn, rugshana, the mother of some kids i work with in muizenberg (3 of whom would rather live on the street or in prison that with their mother) is pregnant AGAIN by a man she hardly knows. after trying to get an abortion and finding out it's too late, she promises that she's going to give the kid up for adoption and that a family has already been lined up (this is a lie). when she told her her first son about the new baby, he said, (((((HEAR THIS)))))
"i will not even look at that baby. our family has 34 kids, not 35."

yes, that's right. there are 34 children in this family, all from different women. that's 34, soon to be 35, kids who don't have a mom and dad (mom's on tik, dad died 5 years ago), don't have a promise of family, don't have a future promised for them, don't even have a home (as in four walls and a roof) to begin life in.

and that's 35 extra "emergencies" for the department of social services to do nothing with. which led a man in the meeting to ask yesterday "where is the hope in that?"


i am listening to this jay-z song on repeat from his latest album, kingdom come. this song is one he wrote about hurricane katrina. this one part is running through my mind after that meeting and after the year and a half of live i've lived in south africa...
So many times I'm, covering my eyes
Peeking through my fingers
Tryin' to hide my, frustration at the way that we treat
Turn on the TV, seein' the pain
Sayin' such a shame
Then tryin' to go on with my life
Of that, I too, am guilty
So we send a lil' money, tell 'em it's alright
To be able to sleep at night
You will pay that price
While some of these folks' lost their whole life
Now it wasn't on the nightly news no more
Suddenly it didn't matter to you no more
In the end almost nothing changed
What the hell, what was that for?

auntie m.

i wish all of you could get a chance to know auntie margaret of #113 trevor siljeur road, capricorn. she's the fireball of the community. nothing comes in or out without her knowing since she lives at the main entrance to the community.

i got to know her through mingo, who lives with her during winters here. last winter i began visiting her once or twice a week. then when mingo left, i continued stopping by just to say hello and chat with her. she's fun to talk to.

she has alot of kids, both her own and other people's. she wants to open a children's home because she jokes that she's known as the one who opens her house to anyone. sometimes that gets her into trouble, but other times it really helps a child out.

her oldest is marvin, he's about 19. then comes stephie, she's 17. then there's sherlyn, who is about 12. then brutjie, he's maybe 6. and then there was tyron. tyron would have been two this coming august. instead, tyron died at 8 months of "food poisoning". he was in the hospital, and then in the grave within a week of being a normal, healthy baby boy.

i met auntie m 4 months after this happened. i knew she was a heavy drug addict, and i had issues with her taking in mingo and other kids who use drugs in her house. i thought she was one of those ladies who used the kids to run or buy her drugs for her. but that was before i got to know the story of tyron.

today was the second time i have taken her and the family to tend to the grave and put fresh flowers on it. each time she comes across some blooming beauties, she plans a time to go with me. and each time it's been the same. she starts with a vigorous cleaning and pruning of the the land. then she slows into a thoughtful pace. before too long, she's crying out in pain and anguish at the loss, franctically and unsuccessfully trying to scoop up excess dirt and debris and move it to the dirt pile around the back of the plots. anything to keep her from just standing still and feeling the fullness of her loss.

both times i have left in a total daze. her loss blows me away. her life breaks my heart. her daughter stephie just had her second child at the age of 16. and her little boy brutjie got hit by a taxi and suffers from brain damage.

this woman is an honor to have in my life. she is so strong. she still struggles everyday, but she is so hopeful. she likes to be prayed with. she finds strength in our friendship. she never ceases to show me the love she has for me.

i look at auntie margaret and i smile. just as the shoots of bright green grass sprout up through the dead ground of tyron's grave, so does her life and love burst out of the darkness of capricorn.

if you come to south africa, spend some time with this woman. she's a blessing. and she needs your prayers.

"it's great to be great, but it's greater to be human." --will rogers.

the letter 'm'

the other day i was in capricorn. a small girl named mckayla approached me. she is the niece of my little friend poem. as usual, she embraced my knees and looked up at me with her face covered in the stain from a local brand of tomato-flavored chips.

"swing me", she said in afrikaans. she loves when i grab her by the arms and twirl her around quickly. instead i just knelt down and gave her a big, long hug.

blinky's mother was standing next to me with her new baby girl in her arms. she was busy showing me how every child in capricorn has recently purchased her new caps she knits for 10 rand. it was true...i saw checkered-patterned heads running here and there. she was proud to be represented all over the community.

slowly a young man walked up to me. he looked very tired...but not the sort of tired that comes from lack of sleep. he looked soul-tired, as if life has become so exhausting simply because it requires him to stand up and face it each day. he just stop and stood there, watching me as i continued to hug mckayla.

"you know, you've just reminded me of something", he said to me.

"really? what's that?" i replied.

"my name is melvin", he told me as he reached out to shake my hand. i introduced myself before he continued. "i've got a little girl of my own. but i don't see her so much. i used to be a good father, but then i became a bad person. bad things came into my life and now i don't see my daugther very much."

"where does she live?" i inquired.

"just across in lavender hill. with my mommy." i asked him when he was going to see her again.

"i'm heading there now. you have reminded me that all i can do is love her. i see you giving hugs to these children, and you have just reminded me to go and hug my daughter. i see you are converted to jesus.

"and miss, when you think of the letter "m", remember to pray for me. i really need His help."

i smiled and promised to do so, then i stood watching as melvin lowered his hand, slid his hands in his jean pockets, and turned in the direction of lavender hill. as he walked away, i thought to myself that he wasn't just another drunk or high teenager talking nonsense, but that the earnesty in his eyes and in his voice would stay with me. i thought "i need to tell others about melvin."

so, if you think of the letter "m", remember to pray for melvin. he really needs His help.