a much-needed perspective.

Snowflake...I regret all the frustration and hurt you are having to experience for your boys. However, if you persevere, the trying of your faith will prove your most valuable possession. Strong characters are not forged in a lukewarm furnace. Please keep feeding yourself God's Word as your soul must have that Food. Keep talking to your Heavenly Father in prayer as He loves your prayers and you need to talk to Him.

I am glad that you had some friends there to console you and reassure you.

I suppose everyone is playing their role exactly as they should. Addicted people acting like addicted people. People that love perversion and deviation pursuing same. Servants of the Most High God serving their Master. I wonder if Jesus felt some of your emotions. Here he had come to save the world from the worst eternal suffering imaginable (and worse) and the people He came to save eventually decided to kill Him. That sounds like loneliness. I guess this indicates that it is the role of the deliverer to be misunderstood. Ouch!

oh how i love god for giving me such a wise earthly father. the above are his words in response to our phone call a few days ago. things are just like a constant battle here. a battle on behalf of those who cannot battle for themselves--the kind of people that god talks about in the old testament, the kind of people christ died for.

a week ago neil and russie and bala disappeared after some drama went down in muizenberg. i drove to capricorn every single day at least once, but usually more than once--and all i could find was that empty feeling in my stomach getting bigger and bigger. my sole prayers became that god would drive neil to call me and he did, 6 days later.

bottomline--they used drugs. and called me to get them back in muizenberg because in capricorn "they cannot escape the people who make them use."

yesterday i talked with brian, neil's best friend, and i asked if he was worried about neil. he got very quiet and said "of course i am. he's going to die."