all in a row.

first of all there was tino and tessa's baby, ashley e. marco. she's now reaching 5 months.

then there was stephie and bigo's baby, "baby ryan". he's nearly 3 months.

and now, neiltjie's sister brenda just had a baby girl. she's 2 weeks old. her name? guess...

on an nonbaby note, i've been blessed beyond measure by the people in my life lately. the families in capricorn are showering us with love and thankfulness as we prepare to depart. the kids in muizenberg are being excited and interested in my future travels and plans in america, which is a miracle from God. and my social-life friends are so excited and supportive, and our fellowship with them has been so sweet! i really do love my life here.

as i prepare to come home in less than 2 days, i think about so many things. i know that it will be very good for me to come home, rest, prepare for the wedding, enjoy time with friends, play, and just "be" for awhile. but my heart already feels the strain of being away from cape town for 42 days. after 14 months of seeing certain people daily, it feels so hard to think of not seeing them for 6 weeks.

man, do i see god's timing and his hand in this phase of my life. god implanted thoughts and desires and hopes into me a year ago. i struggled to keep those afloat admist all the rushing waters and crashing waves and torrential downpours which came my way. i hid them in the shelter of god's mighty wing, and i felt his strength as i took refuge in him during the storm. i felt god's heart for the poor and oppressed so strongly over this past year, and i felt the persecution jesus promises us when we strive to be his servant.

but now, i sit on the shore and the sun is setting on a chapter of my life. i watch as the sky becomes these beautiful streaks of blue and pink and purple and yellow and orange, as if god is taking the day's doings and making a final mural of all that he is, so that we don't loose hope in his promises, in his thoughts implanted within us. and he reminds me that he's been so faithful to that which he gave me a year ago. he hasn't let me down. he's the only one that hasn't let me down. and that's how it should be.

psalm 118 and galatians 1 tell me that it is better to put my trust in god than in man. this year has taken those words and boldfaced, highlighted, italicized, underlined, and capitalized that truth and put a bunch of exclamation marks at the end.

so i'm sitting, watching the sun set with my lord by my side and his future for me laying on the horizon. it's beautiful and it's peaceful. but there are sure to be storms clouds one day, and because of this past years' trials, i know better how to take shelter when the rains fall and the waves crash again.

i really do love this place. i love the faces i've seen,

i love the crowds i've found myself in,

i love the girls who have become mothers,
and i love the mothers who have become grandmothers...
and this will sound strange & scary to you, but i LOVE them gangsters :) thank you, cape town, for letting me in. you are everything i never thought i'd find!

top ten things i can't wait to do when i get to america.

10. lay on a decent couch for the first time in a year.
9. bake lots of cookies at my parent's house with all my fun kitchen tools i left behind.
8. walk through big book stores aimlessly with a soya latte in hand.
7. spend hours hiking in percy warner, running the trails and talking to sarah.
6. eat lots of mexican food. i am considering having an entire meal of just chips and salsa at las palmas.
5. climb dead trees with chris when he comes down from colorado. my arms are stronger this time around!
4. eat a bison burger with kevin whitehurst while harrassing him mercilessly for writing me 3 emails in 13 months. this will be SOOOO fun.
3. hang out with my dog. this will make me cry.
2. see my beautiful friends, jennifer and mike, get married.
1. having a BIG party on april 14th with all my friends and family, and finally get to leave the party without having to say goodbye to ryan!!!

the loveliness around me.

julie hunt. ryan dalton. and me. welcome to south africa, julie!!!

keaton and i at the park.

happiness is all around me. it's oozing out of each moment, even when life is hard. a re-working of all things ashley is in process and it's glorious. i see the world differently. i see it with fresh eyes. i see it with a balanced heart.

i see keaton as one of the most adorable and needing-of-love children i know. and i want to show him God's love. that's my goal for this week.

i see ryan as the most perfect person for me to spend my life with. i am in the midst of god's abundant blessing and fulfilling of his promises. i love this man so much.

and i have a close friend nearby for the first time in 13 months. my soul feels like it's breathing again. i love mrs. julie hunt so much.

and amy and allison are here. and poem is still in school. and brianie has found a safe home. and i leave in 9 days to come home and get married. god is overwhelming me with his love.