The value of "why".

"Sometimes I admire people who don’t ask ‘why’ questions, who only want to know the ‘how’ of life: How do I get paid, how do I get a wife, how do I make myself happy, whatever. The ‘why’ path isn’t so rewarding, if you think about it: What are we here, why do we feel what we feel, desire what we desire, need what we need, hate what we hate? I saw this Calvin and Hobbes cartoon once that had Calvin’s teacher asking the class to turn in their homework. Calvin raised his hand and asked why we exist. The teacher told Calvin not to change the subject but to turn in his homework, and what difference does it make anyway? Calvin leaned back in his chair and mumbled to himself that the answer to the question determined whether or not turning in his homework was important in the first place. And that is what I am talking about here, about needing the answer to the former question before the latter becomes important, about ‘why’ questions determining whether ‘how’ questions are important. And that is what I mean by admiring people who can just get a job, a big house, a trophy wife, and do whatever they want and never ask if it is connected to anything, whether their ‘how’ is validated by their ‘why’."


donald miller, Through Painted Deserts, 19-20

I have people in my life who get annoyed when I ask questions. Or who make fun of me for such attempts at understanding or relating to individuals. In my history of conversations with people, I recall times when I became so hesitant to ask questinos, to be the curious person I've been since childhood.
It hurts my heart right now and brings tears to my eyes. Being unloved or rejected for simply being who I am has been a confusing experience.
If you are out there in the world, asking God or your mom or your boss or your love or yourself "why"...don't stop there. Sit in the silent answers that will become songs of peace and victory and joy and triumph--and, oh God, maybe even acceptance--when God gives you ears to hear His answers. Don't ask anyone else to validate you (i'm preaching to myself here).

A solemn oath: "On this day, August 30, 2005, I Ashley Elizabeth Lovell solemnly give my word of promise to be myself, to ask "why" whenever and to whoever I feel the word coming out of my mouth towards, and to let you walk away from me if that annoys you."